in the shadow of an eclipse

Last friday morning, I found myself turning on the lights as our house became dark and gloomy and shadows appeared in the garden, at strange angles and in the wrong places for the time of day.  

And as I looked out at the sky expecting to see brooding dark clouds, the sky was cloudless and blue, and then I remembered - the eclipse! As the shadows lengthened the birds stopped singing and there was an eerie silence for while and then as the moon passed out of the path of the sun, the shadows receded and the birds were once again chirping away.  

I'm not usually a great fan of metaphors, but some of the shadows that cancer has introduced into my life have also receded in the last few days; as the eclipse that ovarian cancer had become, has shifted on it's path slightly.  On Thursday I was told by my oncologist that there was no evidence that my ovarian cancer had spread beyond the site of it's origin; that for now all the evidence points to the cancer being contained and removed by the surgery.  I was given the choice of chemotherapy, but with the caveat that it would only decrease the chance of relapse by one percent.  So for now, I have chosen to watch and wait and to breath again; to take deep deep breaths and to think about life.  What path my life is going to take now, I have no idea or how heavy the burden of cancer will be; but I want to try to embrace life with all the strength I can muster.

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